I'm afraid I'm a fasting failure.

Reading Thompson's chapter made me so hungry that I started googling Shepherd's Pie recipes. Leftover mashed potatoes and browned ground beef are in the fridge and fairly screaming to be made into Shepherd's Pie, and just reading about fasting was whetting my appetite. Fasting does not come naturally to me.

On top of that, I don't know about you, but I have spent lots more time in the kitchen since stay-at-home orders began. A church friend shared bread starter shortly before the novel coronavirus, and I now have two jars of the magical concoction bubbling away in the fridge so I can bake roughly every 3 days. We've tried bread (obviously), but also soft rolls, crispy crackers and dimply focaccia, each a bread variation with different ingredients and methods.

Furthermore, coronavirus means we eat in more than out - a reversal of our norm. I've baked quiche three times since isolation started – with two of those times being on Sunday mornings (!) – and my piecrust has grown from awful to, well, passable. I've also been scouring the internet for ways to use up pantry items in order to reduce grocery trips. (Note: pudding made from hot chocolate mix freezes into some really tasty fudgesicles!)

It's been a veritable food explosion at our house and Thompson wants me to think about fasting? As I read this chapter, though, and as we continue to navigate covid-19 induced isolation, maybe this practice of self-emptying deserves a second look.

>Pause and consider: what are you missing in this time of social isolation? What new practices or activities have you taken up?

So, stay-at-home orders have been a sort of imposed fast. In a literal way, there are items I'm used to picking up on a whim that simply are not so readily available. (Have you looked for Lysol? Disinfecting wipes? Dare I say toilet paper?) I was talking with a church member just today about how plans for supper evolve based on whether or not key ingredients are even in the store, let alone whether or not they are on sale this week. Coronavirus is setting limits on what grocery items are available to us.

Then there's making do with what I have simply because I don't want to make a trip to the store. Sometimes that's because I don't want to change out of my 'at home' uniform. Sometimes it's because I'm feeling anxious about social contact. And sometimes I don't want to make that trip because I've not been wise enough with my time management to be able to spare the 30 or 40 minutes away. Do you see how this is a kind of second tier of limits thanks to coronavirus?

​More figuratively, we've had to refrain from lots of things that we might be doing. Unless you play tennis or golf, perhaps you've been forced into a sports fast. If you typically go to movie theaters, visit the manicurist or attend parties, you've been involuntarily subjected to fasting from those activities.

The point is this: Fasting is about more than food. It “has to do with the critical dynamic of accepting those limits that are life-restoring.” (p 85) (Please note: I’m not saying that coronavirus has challenged us with limits that are particularly ‘life-restoring,’ just that coronavirus is forcing us to practice a sort of fast. That said, I wonder if some of coronavirus' imposed limits are life-restoring?)

Thompson again: “Our culture would seduce us into believing that we can have it all, do it all, and (even more preposterous!) that we deserve it all. Yet in refusing to accept limits on our consumption or activity, we perpetuate a death-dealing dynamic in the world. That is why the discipline of fasting is so profoundly important today.” (pp. 85-86)

>Pause to consider: What ‘consumption or activity’ are you most prone to want without limit?

“When I relax I feel guilty.”

There are many parts of Thompson’s chapter 5 that resonate for me, but the part that hit closest to home was the title of one of the books quoted in the chapter: When I Relax I Feel Guilty.

Of course, “relax” will look different for each of us. For me, so-busy-I-can’t-see-straight looks pretty much the same as daydreaming (note to self: busy or not, get up and move more). Sometimes “busy” is slightly easier to identify, even for me – it could be a meeting, a phone conversation, keyboard clicks, a worship gathering or a sprint (ok, waddle) down the halls of a hospital.

Then again, there’s the busy version of relaxed: maybe the computer screen has a recipe on it, maybe the sewing machine is in front of me, maybe knitting or embroidery is in my hands, maybe earbuds are serving up Jane Austen, maybe Mr. Darcy and Mr. Bingley are cuddled nearby (they’re dachshunds, btw).

>Pause and consider: What does busy look like for you? What about relaxed?
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I think I started this blog thing by saying that the novel coronavirus had laid Sabbath opportunities at our feet. For the first couple of weeks, though, NRPC staff were busier than ever as we tried to adapt Worship · Grow · Serve for a digital platform. Those early days of covid-19 – they feel longer ago than they really are! – were practically exciting as we reinvented the way we do church at NRPC.

Last week and, before that, Holy Week, were entirely different for me. We’d created a new groove – a different rhythm, a revised schedule – and by the time Holy Week rolled around, the ‘new’ of our stay-at-home orders had worn off.

It was a good shift for most of Holy Week. That week between Palm Sunday and Easter is the most reflective week of the church year and it was good to have some slow time to remember, think, pray and anticipate.

But last week was hard. There were not burning needs in our congregation (thanks be to God!), just a few check-ins, some reading to do, a little writing, too. I tried to slow down a bit and relax a little.
You’d think it would be heavenly chill time, but I was out of sorts and edgy. In short, I realized just how much I depend on my work to give me a sense of meaning/purpose/value/worth. And at the same time, I felt like a slacker for not working at full tilt.

Enter “When I relax I feel guilty.”

>Pause and consider: What do you experience when you slow down, stop to smell the roses, relax, or otherwise practice Sabbath?
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Friends, Christ is Risen! Christ is risen, indeed!

I don't know when I've ever needed Easter so much as I have needed it this year. It seems we are inundated with dire news, as much from the collateral damage due to coronavirus as from the disease the virus inflicts. 

It felt like a particularly low blow not to be able to gather for worship on Easter Day. I mean, if we were to boil the entire Christian faith down to one event, I'd have to say that Easter is IT. There is no statement of faith, no proclamation of the Gospel, no prayer of thanksgiving, no promise of God's goodness that is more compelling than the words at the beginning this post: Christ is Risen! Christ is risen, indeed!

And this year, we weren't able to gather in our sanctuary to proclaim that good news. 

Yet, coronavirus (et al.) did not stop our proclamation! We had a virtual sunrise service and a virtual Easter worship service. Even though we were not worshiping in the same space, we were still worshiping together by way of our digital worship service. I don't know about you, but I had tears in my eyes when I worshiped with you by way of those videos - and I was there when both of them were made, so I knew what was coming! 

>Pause and consider: What is it that makes worship worship?

Ironic, isn't it, that the Worship chapter from Marjorie Thompson's Soul Feast would fall in this week after our having had to gather virtually for Easter Day worship? 

Thompson’s first observation about worship is that we too often have a backwards understanding of what it is. She uses Søren Kierkegaard’s theater analogy to make this point. Imagine walking into the sanctuary at NRPC. Straight ahead you’ll see a raised platform. The front part of the platform has various pieces of furniture; the back part of the platform has musical instruments and a few rows of chairs. Between you and the platform are rows and rows of seats, all facing the platform.

​It would appear that all the action is going to happen on the platform while the seats are filled with consumers of whatever is presented by the platform actors, right? Actually, wrong! Everyone gathered (actually or virtually!) in the sanctuary is a part of the action, while the ‘audience’ is none other than the Triune God! Worship leaders – pastors, liturgists, musicians – might lead and direct, but the entire congregation works together to offer worship to God. In short, worship happens for God’s sake and not for ours.

This re-arrangement doesn’t preclude our coming away with our own needs met during worship, however. Have you ever helped a friend, but found yourself uplifted in the process? You put your friend’s need first, but you benefited, too, right? Worship works in a similar way – offering ourselves first to God, we find our own needs met, too.

>Pause and consider: Why do you worship?

One of the most intriguing sections of Thompson’s chapter is a paragraph about including members of a congregation who are unable to gather in the sanctuary. (p. 57) Throughout the chapter Thompson speaks to the need for shared worship – we support one another, correct one another, need one another! – and here she asks us to consider those who can’t gather with the congregation. It’s a particularly interesting concern when we are all in the situation of being unable to gather.

>This ‘Pause and consider’ comes right out of Thompson’s chapter: Do you think forced isolation makes a person more conscious of the gift and importance of common worship? What might we learn from persons in such circumstances?

All of this makes me wonder what our worship will be like when we are finally able to gather in one place again. Ju, Terri, Brandon and I have enjoyed the challenge of figuring out our virtual worship pattern. For instance, we have opted for recordings rather than streaming precisely because we hope you will participate with us to make worship happen (light a candle, grab a bible, say the prayers – please!). At the same time, we know that worship at a distance means more distractions, so we’ve tightened timeframes and streamlined the order of our service. I wonder when we'll be in our sanctuary again and I wonder what our pattern of worship will be when we re-start in-person worship.

>Pause and consider: How to you think our worship will be different when we gather at NRPC again?

“Worship is the most fundamental of all Christian practices,” writes Thompson. (p. 56) Offering ourselves to God begins a cascade of results for us as individuals and as a congregation, until the cascade overflows into our community and world in a Worship * Grow * Serve way!

​I look forward when we next gather - however we gather – for worship.

Until next time,
Peace!
Lisa

Thompson, Marjorie, Soul Feast: An Invitation to the Christian Spiritual Life (New Rev edition). Westminster John Knox Press, 2014

Spring is breaking out right before our eyes! This is usually such a busy church season that I feel like I have missed Spring for a long long time. We spent lots of time in the garden this weekend, though, and signs of emerging life caught me like never before. 

These signs of creation's awakening are just what I need to balance Holy Week's journey of suffering and death - Easter is coming, just as surely as these plants are emerging! (Speaking of which: Follow our Holy Week Devotions as we 'make' the Stations of the Cross this week. You'll notice a vine with flowers twining its way through each of the stations. Even though it is a loose interpretation of Passiflora, I'm convinced it is meant to be Passion Flower Vine, whose blooms have been understood to symbolize aspects of the Passion of Christ.)

These signs of life strike me as the sort of promise that comes with spiritual practice. Dedication, determination, devotion make spiritual practice hard work. But that hard work pays off as new life unfolds in you. First as a bud, perhaps, and then an unfurling and, eventually, a magnificent bloom! 

Pause and consider> Think of an important relationship in your life, maybe with a partner, friend, parent or child. What would that relationship be like if you didn't talk to one another, listen to one another or spend time with one another? What are the things that most nourish your relationship with this person?

Just as our relationships with loved ones require our time and attention, so does our relationship with the Triune God. Thompson starts chapter 3 by saying that "the spiritual life has to do with how God relates to us and how we in turn relate to God. Prayer is the essential expression of this relationship. As with the spiritual life itself, prayer is initiated by God. No matter what we think about the origin of our prayers, they are all a response to the hidden workings of the Spirit within." (p. 31) Just as talking, listening and spending time together are vital to our human relationships, prayer is vital to our relationship with God. 

The Solomon's Seal blooming in my garden right now started me pondering "Set me as a seal upon your heart." (Song of Songs 8.6). The less poetic way to say that might have been to write, "Let your heart belong only to me." This is the kind of longing to be loved that grows out of already loving the other in this deep kind of way. When Thompson talks about this love relationship that God initiates, she says "God's desire for us ignites the spark of our desire for God." (p. 31)

How can we recognize God's longing if we don't stop and listen for it? How can we reciprocate God's love for us if we don't stop and speak with God. And how can we rest in the love we share with God if we don't stop and simply sit in God's presence for a while? All of these actions are forms of prayer and each one births something new in us as we practice them.

>Pause and consider: Find a quiet place, either indoors or out-of-doors, and gaze at something green. Let the phrase "Set me as a seal upon your heart" wash over you. When other thoughts push in, return to the phrase, rolling it around over and over again. What might the Holy One be saying to you through this phrase?